I’ve been feeling a bit lethargic about running lately. I’m not sure why. Don’t get me wrong, I still run 6 days a week and still do my workouts. I think the warmer weather has made it harder to get outside and get going. But it isn’t about wanting to run, it is about running. If I only ran when I felt like it, I would probably run a couple days a week and eventually just stop. To be honest, I get up at 3:30am, get to work by 5:30, leave work about 2:00pm, get home by 2:30, get running around 3:00, finish running about 4:00, cool down and take a shower by 4:30 and then I get a chance to rest. It makes for a long day.
Someone asked me recently if I was obsessed with running. I guess I am to some extent. I really am not an obsessive person, but I think having a goal that I desperately want to meet has made me more obsessive. Also, as I have written before, if I weren’t obsessive, I wouldn’t run. I have to push myself and I like that I can do that. I have only really pushed myself a couple times in my life. Running has brought out an area of my life that I never knew I had, discipline. So I run each day and thank God that I live in a country that gives me the freedom to do so.
Yesterday was Hill Run Thursday. I decided to try and break my record for running up this huge quarter mile hill. I have only done it 4 times in a row in the past, so I thought I would try to get to 5. I put on my new Saucony Fastwitch shoes (which I love by the way) and did a 2 mile warmup. Then the hill… I ran up and down over and over. In the end I actually ran 6 repeats of this hill – a new personal record. I wasn’t trying to break any speed records, but I broke my record and my goal for running this hill.
As I was running home I thought to myself, having goals and meeting or exceeding them makes running (and life in general) much more fun. It is when I have no goals or deadlines or challenges that my life becomes boring and plain. Running gives me new goals almost weekly and I love it. I love the challenge and the trill of running up a huge hill 6 times in a row (I never thought I’d say that). I love running farther and faster. I can’t wait for my marathon in September to see how far I have come. Boston or not, I think I have come a long way since March 2012 when I started (my Nike Plus app tells me so anyway).
So in the end I don’t think I am obsessive about running. I think that by the time I turned 49, I looked at myself and didn’t like what I saw. I was obese, lazy, on a CPAP to breath at night. I had a type of a midlife crisis. I didn’t buy a fast car or try to “find myself”. I just went for a run and never stopped.
Now that I am 50, I like who I am. So if that is obsessive, then I guess I am obsessive.
But I think happy might be a better word.